Best game of the minute

www.kingdomofloathing.com

Go there now. It's easy to sign up. I'm a level 2 Sauceror, also known as a Cilantro Seer. Anyone want to challenge me, I'm game.

If, and I say IF, I were to get ink

I'd get this coat of arms. Sick.

Maybe Marcy and I will do it for our 1-year anniversary. Some people go on trips. Others stay at home. Maybe we'll get tats.

Truth in advertising? My butt!

My future sister-in-law Kelly's washing machine went kaput. She has to call the Maytag repairman, but he can't come until next Tuesday.
What?!?! I thought all those repairmen did was sit around all day waiting for a service call. And Kelly has to wait until TUESDAY.

Maybe they only work on Tuesdays.

Then I found no less than 20 questions on the FAQs on their Web site. Maybe they expect you to do all the work yourself?

Bunch of hokey if ya asked me.

Bret Michaels is king.

Does anyone know the female form nore intimately than Bret Michaels? He's one step below a gynecologist, I think.
A rockin' rollin', screamin', gynecologist.

Train talk

I'm hoping my friend Bob Hughes (Grady, Bobbalew, The Keed) will give us a little insight here, as he knows more about trains than a human probably should.

At the end of the Minuteman Bikeway is this depot where an old Boston/Maine Railroad train resides. The fact that its initials were the same as mine was not lost to me.

I do like the track that leads to nowhere. Looks like a good place to park my bike.

Here's a funny but true story. When we were looking at apartments, we saw the overpass next to my future home, and I asked the landlard when he planned on telling us when the trains came through.
"What trains?" he says.
"The ones that travel along that track up there," I say.
He laughs and takes us up the slope. It's a FORMER train track now turned into a 10-mile bikeway. Oh. Whoops.

I think it's best in life to be yourself in moderation.

Our quote book resides in our living room. The rules are thus: Say somethin' stupid, you make the book.
And now, a smattering. Feel free to do your own dramatic reading at home. Play with your friends!

"You smell like waffles." - Bryan
"They're shit waffles." - Marcy
"They're rotten shit egg waffles." - Bryan

"I'm not sure if the ice is cold." - Bryan

"I got caught in a downpur and I'm drenched." - Marcy
"Is my grill OK?" - Bryan

There are quotes sometimes that I say when I'm half-concious at night when Marcy insists on keeping a conversation going. She's rewarded with these gems:

"Have you done the one last lawnmowers?"

"I'm sorry for interrupting you." (said to Marcy as she got into bed and wasn't speaking.)

"I love that there's a momo family."

"Why are there so many leopard-print scarves on the road? Is that like, the new apple pie?"

"I think it's best in life to be yourself in moderation."

Good morning!

Dear construction people,

Let's have a little talk, you and me.
I know it's your time of year to get everything done, and those of us making a commute each day appreciate smooth roads and whatnot.

But enough with the digging the hole, then filling the hole, then digging the hole. Seriously. If you need to get back down there, just don't fill the hole yet. Wait until you're done down there, then fill the hole.

To sum up, that's dig, fill. Not digfilldigfilldig ... hold up traffic ... digfilldigfill.

Thank you.